When I was six, and full of wonder,
I looked to my big brother for answers… “What is thunder?”
Of course! You are so wise! I should have known,
That it’s airplanes dropping bombs, very close to home.

And be careful of the snow, if it’s more than three feet high,
“Because there are snow sharks outside; they pull you under, and eat you alive.”
It must be true, he told me so!
Last winter he saw their fins gliding through the snow.

And the air vents in the car are really for poison gas.
“If a thief steals the car, he turns them on when he gets hot from driving fast.”
There are evil monkeys in our attic, and I’m adopted; now I know.
And if you eat Mom’s house plant, it will help you grow.